Self-Reflection

I spend a lot of time thinking.  About everything.  It, inevitably, makes me a good personal assistant and a terrible family member.  And, that is ok.

I am generally pretty open with how my brain works and how it is not the greatest place to be sometimes – but I am trying to remember that doesn’t mean that I am weak. It is my truth and no one has to support it, like it, or care about it.  Being able to sit here and share how I feel is important to me.

About a month ago, I wrote something that was frightening to others and my husband. I was in a bad place and I felt pretty terrible.  I took down what I wrote because I somehow believed what I had to say was wrong.  It wasn’t wrong.

I’ve been dealing with some major life changes along with some interpersonal shittiness since September and I think anyone would struggle under that kind of pressure.  That’s not to say that I am without fault. I have made tons of mistakes, caused problems, and haven’t really been the best spouse to be around.  But, no one is going to accept me unless I accept myself.  No one is going to love me unless I love myself.

In that vein, I wanted to share several pieces of art I created of myself (it’s never easy to look at yourself and create art (which is exactly why its probably worth doing)).  I don’t know if you remember the painting of Ophelia by John Everett Millais – I am not actually a huge fan of that period of art, but I wanted to create photographs of myself that looked like paintings.  I wanted to invoke romance, but also sadness. Depth and all the things that are fleeting. Darkness, but also dreams.

 

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5 thoughts on “Self-Reflection

  1. Wow. Those are a very good.
    And you are right, it starts with self acceptance and love, then you build from there

    Liked by 1 person

  2. These are truly wonderful artworks. Love your choice of color.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. How Do You DO That? Achieve what you set out to do, so beautifully, so chillingly? These are truly amazing. Congratulations. I am moved.

    Like

    1. Thank you! I’m not sure but I’m proud!

      Like

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